Confession of a Mother

I have some strengths.

I am organized.  Sometimes annoyingly so.  My DVDs are filed away by genre.  So are my cd's.  And then they're alphabetized within genre.  I arrive at church half an hour early to prepare for Nursery. My grocery shopping list is separated into sections of the store, and sometimes even by aisles.

I work hard.  The first month I worked in a call center for the credit union I broke the record for the most hours spent on the phone.  My teachers and bosses have all loved me because I always go above and beyond to find every possible way to excel.  I graduated magna cum laude.  I love to learn and apply my newfound knowledge.

I am optimistic.  I often start sentences with, "At least....."  Once in 8th grade my friend said to me, "Don't you ever get sick of looking on the bright side all the time?"  I guess I annoyed her.  Probably one reason why we are no longer friends.  But I often can find the good in most situations.  It's one reason I enjoyed my thankful posts for Thanksgiving.

But I have plenty of weaknesses.  And the greatest of them all has been slapping me in the face for a good two weeks now.

When it comes to my family, I don't utilize my strengths. 

(A little off subject, but something I need to get off my chest: I've known for a long time that I treat perfect strangers kinder than I do my own family.  I'll smile at a child crying in the grocery store.  Unless it's my own kid.  Then I'll grit my teeth and make threats that I'll never fulfill.  Am I really going to lock my child in the car?  No.  But I hiss it anyway.)

I do things well for other people, but when it comes to my own home, I'm too lackadaisical.  As if I expect my kids to just suddenly start cleaning up after themselves.  Hello?  How are they supposed to do anything if I don't teach them first?  Why should I expect mornings to run smoothly if I don't set the example of getting out of bed on time?  What good am I doing by letting them get away with no responsibilities beyond homework?  And it's all laziness on my part. 

We had Family Home Evening tonight where we established daily, weekly and monthly chores.  A first step in making our home more of a haven than a dump.  The only way this new plan will work is if I stay organized, work hard, and remain optimistic that it will be worth the effort in the long run.  I can do those things outside the home.  It's time to do them inside the home. 

It's time to flip my weakness into a strength.  It's nothing a whole lot of prayer and determination can't fix.