Tuesday, October 26, 2010

The Theory of "Mom Years"

I'm pregnant.

I know, shocker.

I was thinking about it this morning, though.  This weekend I was blessed with  more energy than I've had in weeks.  Yesterday morning I did more housework in four hours than I was able to do in the last four weeks.  What's the difference this pregnancy compared to my first?

10 years.

I'm 33.  That's not old.  I swear.  I have lots of life left in me, but this pregnancy has knocked me on my butt.  It was WAY easier when I was 23.  I was working a full time job where I was on and off my feet 8 hours a day.  I had a thirty minute commute to work, which really wasn't too bad.  I still did all the shopping and cooking and most of the cleaning.  And I did swell up to the size of the Goodyear blimp.  But until I was morbidly pregnant (like morbidly obese, just with an 8 lb baby inside me) I was functioning just fine.

I have a few more/different activities in my life now.  I still do all the shopping, cooking, and most of the cleaning.  I'm not working at the bank for 8 hours a day, but I am taking care of a 22-month-old 24/7.  I help 3 kids do their homework.  I do laundry twice a week to keep up with everyone.  I do all the little mundane "Mom" things each and every day (this week is focusing on making Halloween costumes).  And I spend about ten to twenty minutes each evening reading to each child individually so we have that bonding time together.  So I'm not at a paid job 40 hours a week, but I consistently work everyday.

Here's my theory.  Kind of how they say there are 7 dog years for each human year, so it is with typical calendar years and Mom Years.  With the birth of every child, a mother's body ages.  Not the way she looks, necessarily, although that may be true for some.  It's just the way she feels.  It all catches up with her quicker and quicker after each child: the fatigue, the sore back, the lack of motivation and energy, take your pick.

I think, for the sake of easy math, a woman's body ages, oh let's say, five years per kid.  So I was 23 when Emma was born.  That means that even though I was technically 24 when Abby was born, my body was 29.  Two years later Matt was born and in Mom Years I advanced to 36 -- in calendar years I was 26, but I'd already had two other kids (5 + 5 = 10 + 26 = 36).  When Millie was born, the calendar said I was 31 but in Mom years I was 46.  Now, in Mom Years, I am 53 and pregnant. 

Dang!  No wonder I'm so stinking tired!!


Merinda Reeder said...

Now there is some logical and believable reasoning. I'd say it's true. What you're saying is that I'm 42. Hmmmm. Still not quite a really good excuse; but better.

Jabon said...

Ha ha you're OLD!!!! Sorry... Would not trade a woman for that ever. That is why I clean, vacuum, do dishes, do laundry plus all of the normal MAN chores so Tara can have a break from being Mom...

colds1 said...

You cougar you! Does Josh know?

photomama said...

I totally agree! I have also noticed that "Mom Brain/Pregnancy Brain" doesn't seem to heal until all the kids are grown, out of the house, and having babies of their own...that said, you should have your brain back when you're about 97. Isn't is great the stuff we go through for our kids?

Lori said...

And we wouldn't change a thing.