Monday, August 9, 2010

Saved

In line with the "Thankful" post the other day, I'm blogging another answer to my friend Jeri Dawn's blog game of "Getting to Know You." And I will heartily laugh if you began singing the song just now.

The latest question:

"What or who or when or how did someone save you?"

This is a huge question. And, for me, I cannot just answer it. I have to study the question, ponder it, mull it over in my mind, and then just scrap all that and write whatever may come to me. You know. How I usually write my blog posts.

Because of the different types of saving, I'm going to break it down.

Physical
I have been physically saved at least twice. Once was on the Arkansas River in Colorado. I went white water rafting with some friends from my ward, including my mom, our bishop and his family. While going down the river, the raft flipped. Here's the bad part. I can't swim. Here's the good part. I was wearing a life jacket. The river washed me away from the raft and another raft in our party had to come get me. I drank half the river that day. I also never went rafting again, much to Josh's disappointment.

The second time I was saved by Dr Richard Porreco when Matt was born. He saved my son when he was born, which literally tore up my insides. Dr Porreco found the unexpected bleeding, got my blood transfusion taken care of, and I was still able to have children afterward. If Matt had been born in the little town we lived in rather than Denver, either Matt or I may not be here.

Social
Like many others, junior high was a hard time for me. We moved to Utah and I hated it. I hated my parents. I hated the people. I hated the church. I hated school. I hated my siblings. I hated life. Several different groups of people helped me out of my funk. My parents stuck by me and never gave up or quit praying for me. My friends in my new ward reached out and welcomed me, even though it took me a year to accept that outreach. I wandered between a few groups of friends at school, never really feeling a part of any of them. It was a while before I allowed myself to truly feel a part of my friends' lives. I don't know that they ever really knew that I felt so lost for so long. But by ninth grade, I had a secure place with my friends and I still love each of them.

Love
Josh saved me. He saved me from worry, dread, heartache, loneliness, emptiness, and every other bad thing you can think of. I spent a lot of time moping around because I hadn't found him yet. He has tamed me (sort of) and I can't imagine the idea of happiness without thinking of him.

'Cause when I'm a bullet shot out of a gun
'Cause when I'm a firecracker comin' undone
Or when I'm a fugitive ready to run, all wild-eyed and crazy
No matter where my reckless soul takes me
Baby you save me
-Kenny Chesney, You Save Me
There are times when he's the only person that can calm me. Of course, he's also one of the things that shoots me off, but that's a whole other subject.
Emotionally
Just over a year ago, I prayed for a miracle. I prayed with all my being. I fell asleep praying, something I've never done before or since. My family was in jeopardy. Satan did his best to bind us in darkness. I have an inkling of what Joseph Smith experienced with his first prayer in the Sacred Grove. He had gone to pray, to ask the Lord which church he should join. But before he could begin his prayer, something happened to him:
...I had scarcely done so, when immediately I was seized upon by
some power which entirely overcame me, and had such an astonishing influence
over me as to bind my tongue so that I could not speak. Thick darkness
gathered around me, and it seemed to me for a time as if I were doomed to sudden
destruction. (Joseph Smith History 1:15)
I don't know that I can fully understand this feeling, but that night a year ago, I came close. I felt "doomed to sudden destruction." Joseph pleaded for help and was saved by the appearance of God the Father and His Son, Jesus Christ. I was saved by the inspiration to utter in my own prayer, "We need a miracle. Please send us a miracle."
The next morning my miracle manifested through several different people in many different ways. We were saved. We were free. We found the strength to overcome our "thick darkness." I've been scarred by this event. It haunts my thoughts still. But we've overcome the earthly trials it caused. Our Heavenly Father saved us through His miracle. He continues to save me every day to overcome the memory of our near "sudden destruction."
Well. That was long and a bit deep. But I've been saved. Many times. In many ways.

5 comments:

Carina said...

Yes, I am truly your friend. I sing that every time I read those words. I LOVE the King & I.

Very nice Shelly! There are definitely many ways we can be saved. The Lord knows how special you are, though you may not know it, and he has reached down his loving hand many times to save you. I am thankful because I rather like to have you around.

colds1 said...

I'm glad that you keep getting saved.

I remember calling you our freshman year of college. You had just been in an accident in the canyon. I cried and prayed a prayer of gratitude that you'd been saved. Love ya, friend.

Merinda Reeder said...

I like your post. I was too chicken to post the big saves; I'm glad you did. I find it interesting that most who have taken this question from Jeri Dawn's game were going through a lonely dark spot that none of the rest of us knew about, though lots of us were there?

Jeri Dawn said...

Maybe that is why we all ended up together...why our group was so big and accepting...why high school ended up being so fun. I do love all my old buddies--and I miss the ones who aren't playing...

Shelly, thanks for the post. I cried for you and laughed (at you?). Hmmm...you and Mindy need to coordinate your next Utah trip okay? Carina, did you ever find Ruthy?

Carina said...

I was really bad about keeping in touch with people after school. I was sad that you all went on to school and I was trying to figure out what I was doing with my life. But don't worry, I figured it out.

I just looked at the Clearfield High reunion board and she wasn't listed as one of the missing. Maybe Jana knows how to get in touch with some of our lost friends.

Speaking of reunion, when is the next one? My aunt just went to hers and they had a Seminary reunion temple session before the regular reunion. She said it was AMAZING to be in the temple with friends after all of those years. Wouldn't that be neat? Just a thought.